Listen to the Experts
According to experts, the coronavirus pandemic could be with us for eighteen months, two years, or forever. During this time, experts explain, it is essential that humans avoid all unnecessary contact with other humans, in the name of preventing the spread of this virus which has already spread so widely that no one has any idea whatsoever how many people have contracted it. In light of this view, governments are rushing to pass emergency spending bills which, according to experts, are needed to offset what experts are calling “the economic effects of the pandemic.”
Meanwhile, experts are recommending the enactment of sweeping government regulations aimed at forcibly restricting ordinary human behavior, on the grounds that, as experts explain, the only way to stop humans from exercising their free will in ways contrary to the experts’ recommendations is to institute totalitarian measures and enforce them with police state procedures.
Entry for a future glossary of coronavirus terms:
Expert: A person, real or imaginary, especially one cited by the news media or government spokesmen, who says what you wish to believe.
Corollary: A non-expert is therefore any person who casts doubt upon your preferred beliefs, i.e., who contradicts the experts, as defined above.
Explanatory note: In a time of media-induced mass hysteria, school-induced mass ignorance, and soft-despotism-induced mass submissiveness, an expert is any person whose words rationalize your worst fears, and/or any person who recommends more paternalistic (i.e., tyrannical) government action to protect or save you from the perceived source of your fear.
Clarification of Explanatory Note: The “perceived source of your fear” is, of course, not the real source of your fear. The real source of your fear is the combination of media, school, and government influences outlined in the explanatory note, above.